What it means to start school again at 30

 Sunday, Sept 23 - Day II.101 (465)
Safe travels from NM, albeit delayed, to CO.

Monday, Sept 24 - Day II.102 (466) 
I'm thankful for all the help I got with my multiple car problems. 


Tuesday, Sept 25 - Day II.103 (467)
Safe travels from Omaha to Chicago. Home, again, kind of.

Wednesday, Sept 26 - Day II.104 (468)
Today I had lunch with my advisor. I know that I am lucky to work with a woman who already has tenure and multiple books out, and who is responsive and positive and completely has my back. I am very lucky, honored to work with her, and completely determined to make her proud of me.

 Thursday, Sept 27 - Day II.105 (469) 

Today was my first day of class again. I felt so childlike, in some respects.

Also, am grateful to my stellar boyfriend for all my school supplies (see above). 

Friday, Sept 28 - Day II.106 (470)
Sometimes you just need a night at home. It's been so hectic - I am grateful for the breather, before things get even more hectic.

Saturday, Sept 29 - Day II.107 (471)
I really do love the Rogers Park Fruit Market. Gotta love a place where you can get Vietnamese hot sauce, taro, feta and fresh thyme. I also went to Dominick's for the first time today. I think I like it better than Ralph's in LA...


Sunday, September 30 - Day II.108 (472)

If I'm honest, I didn't get the break I needed to be able to process how huge this shift in my life is; my transition was altogether too chaotic, terrible and all-around tardy to allow any space for that kind of reflecting. I don't feel at home here and this city just feels weird to me. There is something on edge about it in a way that I find disconcerting. I realized that I hadn't even talked about how this feels like my fake life - like I'm going to go back to USC, and to LA and my beloved community there - at some point. But this is my real life, despite what it feels like, and this is my real career, and everything matters about 1500 times more than it ever has before.

Now I'm grappling with the effects of a stressful move, while trying to gain ground and establish myself in my true profession. I'll get there. Tonight was the first night that I felt like I was owning myself, owning this decision, fitting into the capacious shoes set in front of me.  Let's be honest, this program is incredibly rigorous and cuts across subfields, so I'll be required to be proficient in biological anthropology and archaeology, both of which I have no background in & I'm diving in at the 401 level. I want, I need, to be successful at this.

So thank you, Micaela, for that.